This blog is to thank Becky for her wonderful advice! Perhaps others have given me similar advice before, but I wasn't ready to hear it or heed it. Gracie's tantrums have been increasing to the point that I have become too frustrated to deal with it. Saturday was Ronnie's last Upward Basketball game. I was excited to watch him play, but as usual, Gracie didn't have any interest in sitting still. At one point in the game, in a fit of frustration, she flung her head back & hit her head into my mouth & made me bleed. I took her to the bathroom where I proceeded to cry. I wasn't crying from the pain, but from the frustration that I have when I cannot "control" her! I am constantly being stared at in public with some frustrating glances. That is embarrassing to me. I never see other kids being as loud, disruptive, or as bad as I seem to think Gracie is behaving. She can be extremely mouthy & despite her lack of vocabulary, she can talk back with grunts & gestures. Fortunately for my sanity, Grammy offered to watch Gracie & Ronnie for the weekend. I didn't realize how much I needed some space & time away from the kids. Crying on the phone to Becky, she gave me the perfect advice at the perfect time. I have been praying for help. Becky reminded me that Gracie can understand more than I realize. Before I take her somewhere, I need to tell her gently what my expectations are. Then I can tell her that if she is good, she can get a reward. Rewarding positive behavior is something I have tried to do, but have failed greatly.
Tonight when Gracie came home, we went to Burger King. I sat Gracie down & told her we were going to Burger King & that Mommy expected her to sit in her seat & eat her dinner. I told her I expected her to eat without screaming. If she did this, she could have a cookie after dinner. It worked! She was wonderful! And she ate dinner. Tonight she has already gotten out of bed 5 times. (It's 9:30 pm). The last time she got up, I told her that I expected her to stay in bed. I told her that if she got up again, Mommy would have to spank her. I told her this very gently while holding her & giving her a kiss. I asked her if she understood & she said "S". She stayed in bed. I didn't have to yell at her & she listened. I pray that I can continue to lovingly reward her & see positive results. I'm staying positive for now. I was born without the patience gene. God granted me the privilege of having a beautiful daughter - one who is a lot like her Mommy. Maybe that's my frustration??? She's too much like me!
Midnight & Carley got neutered & spayed. They had to wear the collars to stay away from their stitches!
I've become a redhead. I look like Gracie now!
Gracie pulled something heavy down onto her head. Ouch!
Poor Carley looks so sad in her collar.
Gracie loves her Mr. Potato head & likes to wear the glasses!
Ronnie playing basketball...
2 comments:
I am so proud of you! It is so hard to change and to try to become patient when you get so frustrated. Just ask Janel - I wasn't always patient with Jason...and I'm still not always patient. But, if you try to make this a habit, you'll gradually see a change in Gracie's behavior. I'm so glad it is working. Keep me posted. The pics are adorable! I loved the video! Ronnie looked great playing b-ball... Becky
It is hard to be patient. I have to remind myself of that all the time. And I may have to even more so now that I have another one coming. I am glad that you and Gracie are communicating better. Keep it up! :)
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